In a normal ongoing Sugar relationship with an Allowance Daddy what do you consider reasonable and fair allowance?
A reasonable and fair allowance is whatever two people can agreed on. Let's say a SB may think that 3k/month is reasonable, but the pot SD may have other ideas depending on what he is looking for. Consider how much time and effort you will be able to put in the arrangement given the allowance you expect (ie how often can you meet, and how much time can you spend for each meeting) and see how does that relate to what his expectations are. You may be willing to meet twice a week, but the SD may not have that much time and can only meet twice a month. Therefore in his mind he may not have the same expectation about the allowance as you do. When it's a long distance situation with travel involved it can be more complicated as the meetings are usually less frequent and the duration of each meeting can be longer.
As I have mentioned before, SD's who are willing to provide consistent financial support are in greater demand and therefore have more choices. If he is willing to provide 3k a month (or whatever amount), he will have his own selection criteria to determine who is the best match. Find out what the criteria is and see how you match up.
Also consider the "Allowance in Real Dollar Terms" concept. Think about what kind of job in the real world will pay the equivalent of the allowance you seek, and how much effort you need to put into a job like that. Then see how it compares to the effort you're willing to put in the arrangement to get the proper perspective.
SD Guru,
ReplyDeleteSo far your posts have been very interesting and enlightening. But I can't seem to agree with your last statement:
"Think about what kind of job in the real world will pay the equivalent of the allowance you seek, and how much effort you need to put into a job like that. Then see how it compares to the effort you're willing to put in the arrangement."
How can one possibly compare intellectual and physical intimacy to a regular job in the real world? I would think it's best to compare it with the work of a high-end companion (escort). Who normally charges a high fee for her time.
It's very similar - the girl needs to look her best, be on her best behavior, be intellectually stimulating and giving in the bedroom. As well as, being presentable if the client decides to spend some time out on the town.
A lady working as a waitress at a busy restaurant would make much less but put forth a different kind of effort. Actually, the physical effort would exceed that of an escort.
Given this discussion, could you please give me an example of the kind of job (in the real world) you would compare an allowance of $3,000?
:D Thanks,
Sexy Sadie
The comparison I referred to is meant to put the time and effort for an arrangement in perspective with a real job. I did not mean to imply that it has to be comparable. $3k/month is about $50k a year in gross income and in most cases that takes a full time job. For example, If a SB expects 3k/month and is only willing to put a few hours of effort into it a month, then that may not meet a SD expectations.
ReplyDeleteKeep in mind most SD's have worked hard to get to where they are financially. A SB who appreciates the value of money and hard work vs a SB who has an entitlement attitude will come across very differently to a pot SD.
Lastly, comparing SB to escort may seem logical at first, but I'd caution SB's against what I call the "escort fallacy". I'll explain that in a blog post.
Thanks for making it more clear! :)
ReplyDeleteI understand what you mean by valuing a man's hard work. Money isn't easy to earn, I learned it the hard way.
For a $3,000 or $4,000 a month cash allowance (that doesn't require anything else such as gifts/spoiling, etc...) How many visits per month are reasonable? And for how many hours per visit? Example: overnights? whole days?
Sexy Sadie
The allowance vs time spent equation has 2 key factors. First is whether the meetings are local or if travel is involved. If it's local then more frequent meetings can be expected, like once or twice a week, and each meeting may be shorter, like a few hours to an overnight. If travel is involved then it might not be practical to meet more than twice a month, and each meeting may be longer, such as a 2-3 day weekend.
ReplyDeleteSecond factor is whether the SD is married or single. Married SD's may have less time to spend with a SB compared to single SD's. Now let's take both factors into consideration. A local SD who is single may expect frequent meetings and have more time to spend with a SB compared to a travel SD who is married.
Based on my experience and that of my SD friends, at 3-4k a month you can expect at least weekly meetings if it's local, and twice a month if travel is involved. Now before somebody says this is like getting a volume discount compared to escorts, I'd refer back to my comment above about the "escort fallacy" which I'll explain in a later post.
SD Guru,
ReplyDeleteI think the equation you put out there is quite reasonable. Meeting weekly for a few hours or a couple weekends if it is out of town, seems very reasonable.
I won't say anything about the "escort discount" because in my mind :) I hope sex won't be part of the visits for the entire 3 + hours. haha If an SD enjoys sex, that's fine, as long as it doesn't dominate the SD/SB relationship.
Thanks for being more thorough!